just called my therapist. I was advised not to be afraid to show my emotions. So---I hung up the phone---cried---barfed- tried to kick the cat but missed and landed on my ass--then I pretended that I am not seeing what I am seeing. The lessons abound--what often looks good on paper can be highly seductive and deceiving. It's a good thing I already drink---otherwise I would be tempted to start--BTW, arizona scored 99 points tonight against Washington.